Monday, May 30, 2005

Feed the Need for a Vegas Brothers Crush HERE!

2:22 PM by Nicky Vegas

I'm still all a flutter thinking about Kim crushing on all five of The Vegas Brothers.

Actually I'm confused by it. I mean, it is certainly understandable to lust after a bunch of stallions like ourselves, but in an e-mail I got from her recently she still doesn't know who is who around here. So I'm thinking she may be actually a stalker-in-training as opposed to a groupie.

Regardless, we all need fans, groupies, stalkers, and most importantly, CHICKS! So Kim, send me your snailer (your mailing address...short for "snail-mail") and I'll send you a picture of The Vegas Brothers, complete with diagrams, names, whatever you need to attach some preferences to your lusting moments. You can e-mail me your addy and I'll get you your goodies right away.

Now if the rest of you want to start your throbbing crushes on us I think the best way is to get the other Brothers in here for some posting and interaction with our ever-growing legion of fans.

Some of these guys are computer morons. Some are terribly busy to check in often. Some are just lazy. All of them are funny gents and I know once they get to know you and how this bog thing works, they'll be here for your lusting pleasure.

If you're curious to meet them, send them e-mails and ask them to get in here and join the fun. Ladies, feel free to also attach any high quality photos of yourselves in lingerie or nuthin' at all if you prefer. Men, send your boudoir pics to Lance!

Ah, just kidding! No photos necessary. Just drop an e-mail to the boys if you'd like to get them in here for some fun.

Shecky (Been here to visit one)
Bobby (Can't find the power switch on his computer)
Sonny (Comments a lot, but is lonely)
The Very Famous Lance Vegas (Too busy admiring his own reflection to be bothered, but try anyway)

Thanks for the Love, Ladies (& Gentlemen)

2:03 PM by Nicky Vegas

Ask and ye shall receive, or so I was always taught to believe. I asked for some shillin' from the bloggers our there and that's what I got! I wonder if I should start asking for some more "intimate" requests. Hmmm...could save me a bundle in Parumph.


I have to extend some thanks to Golfwidow & Jade for taking the time to promote the upcoming & possibly final Vegas Brothers shows on their fine sites. They are both jockeying for position in the hierarchy of future ex-wives and they surely will have to battle it out in a cage/Jello wrestling match. Until then I thank them for the support.

Other folks kind enough to throw some mentions of our little blog lately include Kim, who apparently is LUSTING after all five of The Vegas Brothers! Take a number lady!

Doyle was kind enough to toss a bone our way, as was Ma, and 3T at some point or another. So go visit all of these folks and tell them how much you appreciate their great taste in blogs, if not comedy/variety shows.

I should also mention that the fols at West Designs are so proud of the work they put into our blog that they're showcasing it at their website. So visit them and spend a few bucks on a site for you!

Wednesday, May 25, 2005

Kenosha, Wisconsin This Week, Joliet, IL Next Week. GOT IT?!

11:20 AM by Nicky Vegas

I don't wanna hear any whining about how you can't come to our shows. All the time, "Waaa, waaa, waaa! I live far away. I can't make it anyway. Why should I care? How could I possibly help The Vegas Brothers become even more famous?"


Sure, this is the internet and therefore, an international community. I know that a lot of our regular readers (both of you) aren't anywhere near Club Highview in Kenosha, WI or Crabigale's in Joliet, IL.

However, I also know that many of you techno-pukes go to a lot of blogs, bulletin boards, and newsgroups. I've got friends in Hawaii, Texas, Las Vegas, Indonesia - all over the freakin globe thanks to the internet.

You probably have an e-mail address book chock-full of potential Vegas Brothers fans that COULD make it to our shows. E-mail, blog posts, and bulletin board threads are FREE and they take very little time out of your day to make. So, if you have any friends, please pass along these very important facts.

Sunday May 29, 2005, The Vegas Brothers, the only show in the world worth watching, will be performing a charity fundraiser at Club Highview, 5305 60th Street in Kenosha, Wisconsin. Show time is around 4:00 PM and we'll be HEE-LARIOUS! We'll also have T-shirts and other stuff there for you.

Thursday through Saturday June 2-4, 2005, The Vegas Brothers will be performing FOUR BIG SHOWS at the ultra-hip Crabigale's Comedy Club & Restaurant. Address is 1 East Cass St in Joliet, IL.

Showtimes are as follows:
6/2/05 8:00 PM
6/3/05 9:30 PM
6/4/05 7:30 PM (Dinner show) & 10:30 PM

Call 815 722-JOKE to make reservations.

Now go spread the word. I'll send ya a signed Nicky Vegas photo if I catch ya shilling for us. Besides, we need freakin' audience members and more importantly, MONEY! So take a look through your bookmarks and address books and do a little shilling on our behalf. Why? Because we're the FREAKIN' VEGAS BROTHERS! 'Nuff SAID!

Monday, May 23, 2005

Grillin' Outside, Shillin' Inside

5:06 PM by Nicky Vegas

Given how new this blog is to all of you, if not the world, you may not have even noticed some of the cool things in the "Buy Stuff!" section of the sidebar. So, since I am always lookin' out for my brothers and our pals, I thought I'd direct your attention there now.

We'll be havin' a lot of our own Vegas Brothers merchandise up here as well as at our main website very soon. We're in a bit of a quandary though(Dig me, I used "quandary" in a sentence properly!) . We've got to raise some cash to bail our web designer/merchandising guy out of jail so he can put that stuff online. Thing is, the only way we can do that right now is to sell some of our stuff...which we can't do until we get our web designer/merchandising guy out of jail. And so it goes, this thing of ours.

Until then I thought I'd mention that some of our best friends have some kick-ass products available and if you check them out, buy a few thousand books & CDs and the like, maybe those guys will throw us a bone and give us a taste of the gig.

Mike Preston is a good friend, a fine stand-up comedian, and the host of his own Comcast Television program, Psycho Babble. He is also the author of some hysterical books. You can get all the info about "Sway", Stop Talking Now", & "The Moron Chronicles" at their respective Amazon locations. Just click on the pics and you'll be whisked away to happy town for some good reading.

T.R. Benker is not only a comedian, he is a great dad & hubby. He was once in the Guinness Book for consecutive joke-telling, a feat he hopes to do again soon. A World Record holder, folks! That alone should be enough to get you to take a chance on his CD, "Sittin' Through the Scary Parts".

Andy Martello, comedian, juggler, plate spinner, and keeper of the last great rat tail ever worn by a straight man, has a few T-shirts he helped design, based upon his comedy act. You can find them at Just click the pics and check them out. That place also has a lot of cool shirts for you to wear, so why not make a whole day of shopping, eh?

And speaking of T-shirts, I thought I'd give you folks a sneak peek at our new official Vegas Brothers T-shirts, which will be available online in a day or two.

Check em out! Simple. Elegant. Understated. Classy. Just like The Vegas Brothers!

You can get em in red or black, in sizes from adult Medium to Extra Large. I hear we'll get them in XXL & XXXL if enough people ask for em. I dunno what the price of these things is gonna be, but I am fairly certain they will be pretty cheap, like $12.00 to $15.00 or something. "Pretty cheap"...just like Shecky Vegas!


Anyway, check out all the goodies I mentioned. I understand if you'd rather hold out until the Vegas Brothers shirts are officially for sale. Who can blame ya? We ROCK and you deserve to spread the word about us somehow! You can reserve a shirt or ten by leaving a comment in this post or e-mailing me. Check back because we're gonna get tanks and baby tees as well as PANTIES for the ladies. Yep. Classy!

Just be sure to pick up a shirt or two when the time comes. Mom needs some sort of cream for a rash she's got and based on her already high prescription bills, I doubt we can afford it right now. Poor woman. Just sitting there, smoking and scratching in our trailer all night.

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Saturday, May 21, 2005

What the Hell is a MEME?

12:01 PM by Nicky Vegas

I got "tagged" yesterday. Normally, this isn't anything out of the ordinary as I am one sexy beast and the ladies can't wait to get with the Juggler Man and his Mighty Balls of Steel (Man, I love juggling humor!)

Anyway, Ma over at Tutu Bent's Hale, tagged ol' Nicky with some sort of internet nonsense called a MEME. I had no freakin' idea what a MEME was and I planned on ignoring it. Then I figured it all out and since Ma wanted to hear from me so badly I thought I'd share it here. A story about the only other time I was tagged by a MEME. You asked for it!

Hope you enjoy it, Ma. I'm supposed to tag 5 others to do this thing. Since I don't tag & tell (unless forced or paid to do so...or if I'm drunk...or if people doubt my manhood) I'm just gonna let this be the end-all, be-all of meme answers.

We worked with a Meme once at this art festival in Thunder Bay, Ontario, Canada several years ago. A lady Meme. Cute gal from what I could see. She also played a lot of those Renaissance faires when she wasn't pissing off everyone around her with her "walking against the wind" crap.

Anyway, she indicated to me back stage that she wanted to "get a taste of Downtown Vegas". She memed the whole thing & at first, I thought she was rehearsing her "eating an overly large and extremely satisfying popsicle" routine. When I saw her meming, "not in my hair", "oh, you got in in my eyes", & "you promised you'd warn me first" I understood.

So we went to my dressing room and I gave her her reward. Later that night I showed her the rest of Vegas, including the Strip. She showed me her "trapped in a box" routine and we had a great evening. Man she was a screamer, which seemed ironic, given that memes don't talk and all.

Friday, May 20, 2005

Vegas Brothers Latest

11:51 AM by Sonny Vegas

Here's some newest and latest pictures of the Vegas Brother's Chaotic Adventures.

Click Here for Photos!

Hugs and Kisses,

Ladies and Gentlemen, Please Welcome SHECKY & SONNY Vegas!

12:14 AM by Nicky Vegas

I'm sure you all know about me and my invaluable talents being lent to The Vegas Brothers Revue. I rock! But enough about me. I'd like to introduce to you, two of my beloved brothers, Shecky & Sonny Vegas.

Since they're still figurin' out how to add crap to their profiles, allow me to say a few things on their behalf.

Image hosted by  Photo By Caysie CannonShecky is one helluva comic. He honed his comedy skills over the years "the old fashioned way" - DRINKING!

If there was a gin joint or strip club with a stage he's passed out on it. When he was awake he told jokes. What more do you need to know? He can't freakin' juggle, that's for sure!

I'm sure he'll tell ya something about him that's interesting, or at the very least, drawn out. Feel free to ask him some questions or something. Just make him feel welcome so he has something to talk about at his meetings.

Image hosted by, Photo by Caysie CannonSonny is...what can I say about Sonny? Oh yeah! Sonny is one of our brothers. 'Nuff said!

What? You want more? OK, he likes chocolate milk and he's not allowed near sharp objects or Valerie Bertinelli anymore. In our show he puts the "ic" in "magic" and the "imp" in "improv".

He usually gets some of the most enthusiastic, if not polite applause from the crowds and we all love watching him do his best to make "real magic" happen. Well, everyone but Lance likes to watch. Lance & Sonny don't see eye-to-eye, but once Lance gets the new lifts for his shoes that should make things better. Don't upset Sonny and nobody will get hurt.

Thursday, May 19, 2005

R.I.P. Mr. Gorshin

10:35 AM by Shecky

We spent a week opening for him at the Black Bear Casino in Winona, Minnesota and he taught us how to drink Gin. I'll never forget those stories about Julie Newmar.

Wednesday, May 18, 2005

The Loss of a Legend

9:51 PM by Nicky Vegas

Who's Laughing NOW? When brother Bobby gets his keys to the place I'm sure he'll have more to say about the passing of the great Frank Gorshin at the age of 72.

Until then let me say that all the lights from Broadway to Las Vegas should be dimmed tonight. Frank Gorshin was a God among men when it came to working the clubs.

He was a comedian's comedian and even though he was an "old school" legend, he was taking the stage and working his craft to the very end. Nobody could follow him. He just tore up the place. He performed often, on TV, film, and of course, the stage.

As I understand it, he was also a guy who knew how to have a good time.

Raise your glasses and toast a legend tonight.

Mark Your Calendars! The Vegas Brothers are Playing JOLIET, ILLINOIS, June 2, 3, & 4, 2005!

5:47 PM by Nicky Vegas

Photo By: Caysie CannonThat's right, kiddies! We're swingin' again and YOU can be there to watch the fun!

Come on out to Crabigale's Comedy Club June 2, 3, & 4, 2005 and watch the unbridled majesty and hilarity that is The Vegas Brothers!

Sure, I know some of you folks are out of towners and think you deserve a pass for not showing up. Well, TOUGH! Book a flight or drive out to Joliet, Illinois to see the show. At the very least, send an e-mail or call your friends in the Chicagoland area (both of them) and tell them to come on out to see the show.

Crabigale's has great food, tasty drinks, cute waitresses, and fine taste in comedic talent. It is also close to the Joliet Jackhammers ball park and the Harrah's Casino. The way I see it, you can enjoy The Vegas Brothers at Crabigale's and then get a taste of Vegas at the casino all in one night. Check the Crabigale's website for cover charge, reservations, and other info regarding this spectacular event.

Monday, May 16, 2005

Testing, Testing...Is this Thing On?

10:50 PM by Nicky Vegas

HEY! Now we're talkin'.
OK, I'm talkin' and that's the way things oughta be, in my O-pinion!

Image hosted by Photobucket.comWelcome to the hip new home of the even hipper new comedy team, The Vegas Brothers! This should prove to be a religious experience for some of you as we're all very inspirational guys in our own ways.

Until I give my brothers the keys to this place I'll be the voice of reason, your host, Nicky Vegas. Sooner or later, the other guys will get bailed out or make parole and then they'll post here too.

Otherwise, feel free to read what we got and post a comment once in awhile, you rummies!

We're here promotin' our show, our merchandise, and our availability to do more shows (& sell more merchandise).

We're also giving you desperate souls a chance to interact and converse with the objects of your affections (and restraining orders), The Vegas Brothers. Some of you may never get lucky enough to actually meet big-time celebrititties like us and therefore, we created this blog to bring a little ray of sunshine into your otherwise hum-drum lives. Nice, eh?

I'd like to give a big shout out to my next ex-wife, Priss, who came up with the snappy design for the place (and gave me a very reasonable price!). She makes these things for a living and does one heck of a good job at it too, so please stop by her blog and tell her how much you love OUR blog!

Image hosted by Photobucket.comSpeaking of blogs, if you see your name on our list of links, please do your fanly duty and link back to us. It's only polite and if you don't do it, we'll come to your house and shove a potato(e) some place it don't belong!